Tramps like Us
by JapanCat
Summary: A conversation in front of an open window... where apparently there's nothing worth looking at. ...Or in which Hiei tries to put the moves on Mukuro... And fails miserably.


Tramps like Us

I actually just wrote this so I can have something with this title. ;o;  
Put your wallet away, you're not buying this stupid thing, shit.

/././

"This is how sad we are, Hiei," Mukuro said, staring out the window, out at the vastness of the terrain, her eyes not picking out one singular detail of it. Her mind processed it as one single body similar to when one stares at a solid block of color. "We live in a society that silently encourages cruelty. What is taken by force, we admire. And we still say we want a hero or a humanitarian to hold our hands. But when we meet a humanitarian we scoff at them, tell them taht their ways will get them nowhere, that they dream too much. After they're dead and all's said and done, we finally honor them. What recognition we may want in life only comes after death. No one wants to be a humanitarian because they don't get what they want right away, not unless they become martyrs. Most people know what they want and they want it now."

"So what's your point?" Hiei asked. He turned away from the window, deciding that the scenery was already dull enough.

"Just a thought."

"That's a really long-winded thought."

She shrugged and continued to stare at the block of scenery. Hiei waved a hand before her eyes but she didn't look away from the window. A half smile crossed her lips. "You something else… We're just a real pair of characters, aren't we? A whore and a thief. Just two murderous tramps."

"You're not really a…"

"Well, in a nutshell, I am. Inside I am. And once you're something you'll have that mark on you the rest of your life. Some of us can hide that but me… I have 'physical trappings' you can say."

"You're not that damn screwed up. And it doesn't effect you so much that…"

"How long's your finger? Or I should ask first which is longer- your index finger or your ring finger?" She paused. "Your…"

"I know what the difference is. You think I'm stupid?" He actually thought he knew where she was going with this. But he still hoped that she was just spewing random garbage again. "I guess my ring finger's two inches, maybe two and a half… and I guess that means my middle's three inches."

"Heh. That means you're aggressive." Okay, maybe she really was bei- "You'd still have a ways to go if you were to stick that in me, you know where. And supposedly I have a deep throat. I never checked it with a doctor or anything. But I wouldn't want my suspicions confirmed. I suppose it's harder to vomit… Though I wouldn't want to do so anyway. At least the person utilizing that would have a good time."

"You're disgusting."

"You asked and went along with it."

"I didn't want to know that much. And I didn't even ask."

"What's done is done." She shrugged.

"Not if I got a time machine."

That got her to look away. She looked at him like he was an idiot, but at least he looked away, right? "Hiei, if you jumped in a time machine to change something in the past, it would have already happened. And chances are if you met your future self, you probably still wouldn't listen to him, I mean, you. Not even you are the boss of you."

What? "Would you listen to your future self even if you knew you were looking at yourself?"

"I'd be more inclined to believe that I was on drugs."

"Exactly."

"So basically you're telling me that you're willing to create a time machine so that you would go back in time but whatever you would use it for would be useless."

He opened his mouth to respond, then stopped. Apparently Mukuro won that battle and she knew it. She turned back to the window and stared at the monotonous landscape. Hiei sighed and looked back. He wished someone would start a fire and make it worth watching. He was actually starting to consider becoming the arsonist just to get Mukuro away from the window. Instead she rambled on and he stayed glued at her side again. "You know, I can still feel it. I still go to bed some nights and I feel his hands on me. Like a damn ghost. Even after all this time, I still remember, still feel his hands on me, in me." She looked at him to take in his response. He remained deadpan. "They say victims of mo- ab- victims sometimes to recover and get scarred for life. I wouldn't think I was susceptible but I am." He still didn't respond. "You know, I started to wonder what it would be like if I were just some normal woman. Unscarred in every sense of the word. Not hearing his voice, his goddamn breathing down my neck every goddamn night. His presence in general. Just if all of that wasn't there. I wonder, would I be happier?"

Hiei sighed. He looked at her and realized that she was staring at him. He looked away and sighed again. "You'd be boring as fuck, I'll tell you that much."

"You think so?"

He turned to her, noticed that she was turned back to the window again. "I meant that you'd just be another brick in the wall. You know how many people I run into everyday? What would make you stand apart from them? Nothing. I don't know why it is you're even asking that. Unless you mean to say that you aren't happy right now because if you are, then I'll jump out the window and burn some trees down and then you'll smile?"

She cocked a brow. "I fail to see how that would make me happy. It sounds like you'll be the one enjoying it. It's also people like you that make our air quality so bad. How will this generations children survive in such terrible air? And it will all be your fault."

"Screw you, Mukuro. Those damn kids don't deserve to live if they can't breathe in bad air anyway. It's called… Natural selection is what it's called."

"Case in point. Though… I suppose I would be happy enough if I wasn't the way I was. I mean that I wouldn't need you."

"None of what I just said made went through."

"Once I got passed your pollution habits, yes, I did. Loud and clear. It was some meaningless speculation."

"You sound more like you're getting a complex. I see nothing wrong with you the way you are right now. I really wouldn't feel any difference."

She gave him a long hard look. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"What you want it to. I know what you can do for me. You're here right now and… But I can pick locks for you. If you ever forget keys or something."

"That has nothing to so with… If you're saying that… You have to do better than that if that's what you're picking at. You have to do a lot more."

"Really, Mukuro? That's not what I…"

"We both know what you meant, Hiei."

He shrugged, knowing he couldn't convince her otherwise. He just let that awkwardness hang between them. Then the silence started to kill him. He glanced at her and said, "So…"

"No," she answered firmly.

"You don't even know what I was going to say."

"I don't need to. The answer's still no."

"What if it was something like 'Are we still alive?'"

"No one said we weren't in purgatory."

"You know, Mukuro, one day you'll say something that makes sense. I don't see why you have to be such a damn philosopher all the time." He paused, after a moment's hesitation, he went on, "This is why you're never happy. They say that smart people are never happy because they're smart."

If she was an internet surfer, she would have called him out on a Department of Redundancy Department. "So why aren't you happy?"

Oh that hurts. "Shut up, Mukuro."

Apparently Mukuro won this battle.

Again.

**Tramps like Us**

"**Baby, we were born to Run…" –Bruce Springsteen.**

**Why didn't they run then? I seriously measured my hand for this one. I'm going to assume Hiei has really small hands. (Have you looked at his hands in comparison to hers? Hers look huge! Or maybe she has big hands… No one said it couldn't be both.) Apparently if Hiei's ring finger is the same size as his index finger… It means he's gay… For some reason. But I always thought your ring finger was supposed to be longer… **

**Dammit, why is CLOSURE such a hard act to follow? I think you can see where I lost my sense of direction. It was more about nothing… And pollution. Like Fraiser meets Captain Planet… Or is it Seinfeld?**


End file.
